Crippling Him.Killing Him.

Since the time I was born to this very day.
He’s been my support.
Physical. Financial. And emotional.
No more perfumes for him. No more fancy lunches.
Courtesy- my education and upbringing.
Heaping of shame. By family and society.
All for my smile.
Raking out more moolah for my whims and fantasies.
Even after his perennial source of income has dried. Years back.
Well, you see I need to give a gold set to my beloved so what if I’ve never even given a flower to my mother.
No preaching Please‼
Well now, joining me in this crusade is also my better half.
Loading him with even more fanciful and choicest of abuses. Telling the truth I say.
Who cares for the true truth anyways?
The truth that my conscience screams to me. And I choose to go deaf against it.
Voila, it doesn’t scream anymore‼
I got him a man for me and then befooled him by turning down the offer that I had so enthusiastically initiated.
He gave in. hurt and humiliated. Yet smiling.
Oh come on, is that enough?
I even have my better half pitch in the good deed.
It’s his/her turn to defame this soul now.
My father.
Abused by my lover.
My brother’s better half. The one who is better only in the limited sense now.
Him. And me.
Capital punishment did you pronounce?
But that’s a cake- walk for all of these. And, many more.
I have crippled him. Killed him.
Crippled his sense of self respect.
Killed my father.
The man who supported me all my life.
Now lies crippled.
What do I do?
Nothing.
Hurl more abuses at him.
And accuse him of not ever having done anything for me.
Dupe him of his stored resources so very royally and then scream more abuses at him.
Enjoy my own heaven away from him.
I believe my father truly deserves all this.
What to do?
He is a father after all;
And when is a father’s love ever glorified?
Those eulogies are exclusively reserved for the batterers of our hearts.
Fathers deserve only these.
Abuses. Tears and humiliation.
For all their love.
True. Unconditional.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

1 comments:

Flying high in the sky.... said...

munnoo....i am saddened by your write up ...no betu ...you are our pride...we all make mistakes ..but that does not mean we dont love...the love you have for him is more than anything or anyone can have for him...dont feel what you are feeling sweetie...trust me .... you are the one who really loved him purely...

keep smiling...